His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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