you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
