Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
