Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
