I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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