sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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