let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
