i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
