all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
