I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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