Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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