no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
