that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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