i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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