what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
sarcasm needs its own font
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
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