Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
