You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
