Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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