I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
