So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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