THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
