I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
