...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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