I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
