Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
you didnt know i had herpes?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
