Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
