The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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