ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
