if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Say something about gay babies.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
