Did you just see the Batmobile???
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
