but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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