I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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