Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
