The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
