I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
This is my gift to your gina
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
