I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
