She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
