According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
is this the sara with the beer cane?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
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