Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
