the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
