Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
