i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
