Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
