I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
