He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
