Just mADE A PArabola og urine
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I see more hoeing in ur future
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