My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
