it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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