I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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