Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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